"I wish I could do more!"

 “I wish I could do more!”

Above; Our Lady of Kyiv

In the past week I’ve heard my heart, my wife and many more say those exact words. “I wish I could do more!”  The people of the Ukraine have entered into the Wilderness of War. Young men and old take up arms to defend their homeland and their families. Half a million refugees have already fled into Poland, Romania and Moldova. We are learning our Eastern European geography once again. In our own minuscule attempt at defiance we’re saying Kyiv as the Ukrainians say it and not Kiev as the Russians do. “I wish I could do more!”

The haunting words of the First Lesson are front and center on the world stage of history;

“Let all the inhabitants of the land tremble,
for the day of the Lord is coming, it is near--

a day of darkness and gloom,
a day of clouds and thick darkness!

Like blackness spread upon the mountains
a great and powerful army comes.”

We hope and pray for God’s army to protect us rather than for Putin’s army to menace a people who only want to live in peace.

Into the Wilderness we go. Ash Wednesday comes to us this year at exactly the right time. Jesus goes into his own wilderness and there he wrestles with his demons. “I wish I could do more”. 

But here there is something you can do. In fact I am going to recommend that you do three things as you wrestle with your inner life in the Wilderness of this particular Lent.

First, let us begin with a period of self examination. I know that sounds vastly inadequate in comparison to what the folks in the Ukraine are going through or in terms of what Jesus was preparing himself to do for us. But we have to begin somewhere.

Take a good look at your own life. Pray as Jesus taught us to pray in today’s Gospel; “Whenever you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you.” 

Ask some questions like; What is important to you and what can you let go of? Where are your areas of satisfaction and frustration? In what ways are you energized and joyous? Where are you depleted and downcast? How do you spend the precious time God gives you? Think of your family and friends. They are counting on you and your wisdom, your love and in so many cases your forgiveness. Perhaps you are the one who is lost. You may be the one in need for wisdom, love, encouragement and forgiveness. And so much more. The Wilderness of our own souls has much to teach us. Go there with Jesus this Lent and learn with him. This is something you can do.

Secondly, read something. Turn off the TV and the Radio. Practice Silence for a time. I can recommend all kinds of books to read if you like. Perhaps you could read something from Kenneth Mcintosh. His book; “Water from an Ancient Well” was worth reading. Or anything by John Philip Newell. I recently finished “Sacred Earth, Sacred Soul”. On the other hand, you could pick up any book by any author and learn from it. It really doesn’t matter. Or study with Cathy the book she is planning to share with you during our own congregation’s Lenten journey. There are so many things to read for you heart and soul’s health.

Thirdly, sacrifice something. I realize that the idea of sacrifice is not a popular one but I am thinking of the folks in the Ukraine and what little I can do to share the journey with them. Perhaps there is something I can give up. Jesus fasted forty days and forty nights. Perhaps there is something to this idea of sacrifice. Every great religion on earth has a time of self discipline and sacrifice. Perhaps it is time to pray. 

Finally, be of good cheer. This is what keeps us going as we journey through life’s many wilderness periods. We need each other to talk to, share joys and sorrows. This is what makes me so grateful to be among a people like you. Somehow we’ve made it through all of what history has thrown at us throughout these thousands of years. Your love, your kindness and your good cheer. Your dogged resiliency.

David Bowman was an impish sort of fellow who loved to banter back and forth with his friends. When he became the Bishop of New Western New York he remained himself. He would call the clergy first thing every Ash Wednesday with a cheerful; “Have a gloomy Lent.” Everybody had a good laugh and to this day I receive a phone call from a former parishioner who loved that story. “Have a gloomy Lent, Fr Paul”, says she. And we both laugh.

We may or may not find a way to do more. But what we will do is to find a way to do enough. 

In the Name of God; the Most Holy, Undivided and Everlasting Trinity. Amen

Fr Paul