"I Cannot Believe"

"I Cannot Believe"

Like Thomas, Elaine could not bring herself to believe. But it wasn’t just the resurrection of Jesus she could not believe, she couldn’t even bring herself to believe in God. 

Elaine was a bit of an introvert and sat in the last pew in the far corner of the church as far away from the pulpit and the altar as she could get. She came late and left early. It took the longest time to find out who she was. 

As it turned out she began coming to church after her mother died. Apparently she was trying to make sense of things. It took quite a while but one day, she worked up the courage to get into the receiving line and greet me. I thanked her for being there and invited her for coffee but she was clearly not ready for that. And so it continued week in and week out for what seemed to be a very long time.

One Sunday, as we greeted each other, she asked if we could make an appointment. We did that. We had quite the conversation. She told me of her mother’s death, and how much she appreciated our church services, the preaching and the liturgy. But then she confessed to me with a heavy heart full of anxiety and guilt that she simply could not believe in God. She simply did not see how she could build a case to support the idea of God when to her way of thinking there simply was no evidence for the existence of God. 

In getting to know Elaine I found out that there were secrets in her family of origin especially involving her father that left some deep scars. She could not tell me exactly what the nature of those traumatic moments were like but I had my suspicions. For Elaine, God was not there when most urgently needed and that’s when I began to understand the nature of her unbelief. 

One day she did confess that she wished she could believe the way I believe. She told me that one of the reasons she came to church as regularly as she did was that she liked hearing stories of faith. Oh how she wanted to believe!

I tried the one about the father of the boy Jesus healed; “I believe, help my unbelief”.

Elaine laughed, “Fr Paul, I can’t even get that far.” 

To which I finally said; “How about this? God and I both admire your honesty. What if I were to tell you that God believes in you irrespective of your ability to believe in God!” 

That one stopped Elaine in her tracks. She began to wonder. “What if God believes in me? Do you suppose that’s even possible?”

To which I smiled and said; “I wonder!”

This is what happened to Thomas on that Second Sunday of Easter. Thomas was Honest to God and to the Disciples about his doubt. “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.”

It was Jesus who believed in Thomas. “A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.”

“Thomas; Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.”

To which Thomas said; “My Lord and my God!”

The idea of belief whether it be in God or Heaven or the Resurrection rests not so much on what my puny human mind can fathom but rather on the power of Jesus to believe in me.

It was Jesus who called us one by one to follow because he believed in us. It was Jesus who broke bread with us in the upper room and got to know us one by one. He was the one who healed the sick, fed the hungry, reached out to the leper, the prostitute and the outcast. It sure wasn’t the likes of us. We couldn’t, we wouldn’t do any of that. We did not; we could not believe. Jesus was the one who did that!

It was Jesus who taught us that God shows no partiality to any one kind but that all are one in Jesus. When I think back I realize how true is that is. I think  of all the churches I have served in these almost 50 years and the people in them. What a crowd of characters. As Cindy likes to remind me, I’ve served more church since I “retired” than I served during my career.

Last week as I celebrated my 49th Easter Sunday as a Priest I found myself blessing the incense “in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning is now and will be forever.” I found myself caught up in the notion of Jesus as “the Alpha and the Omega; the Beginning and the Ending who is and who was and who is to come, the Almighty”, exactly as the Book of Revelation puts it today. 

Jesus showed us the way to the Father.

It is the way of Love. 

Heaven begins in our Baptism; “in the Paschal mystery established in the new covenant of reconciliation” as the Collect for the day puts it. The compelling fact of heaven is that we don’t have to wait until we die to know what it's like, we begin living heaven in the way we come alive now in the Living God.

This is how we learn to Believe! God. Heaven. Eternal Life. It is all a Way of Life we live now that we have become children of the New Covenant of Reconciliation. 

If I were to wait until I could understand God, I’d never believe. The same is true of any and all of the Great Mysteries of Heaven. I don’t even fully understand the forgiveness of sins but I’m duty bound to forgive as I am forgiven.

Doesn’t his prayer say as much; “Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us?” That what a “trespass” is. It is a sin, an offense against God and our neighbor. 

Believing for Thomas and Elaine and me and you is not about anything we can figure out, comprehend, or understand. If we are honest to God and one another, we won’t really believe it until we see it with our own eyes.

Which is why Jesus appears to us in the Upper Room and says; “Peace be with you.” Notice in today’s Gospel. Jesus says that three times. God knows our unbelief. Which is why he manifestly appears to us time and again to say; “Peace be with you”. 

To which I reply as Thomas did; “My Lord and my God.”

I might add this prayer that You might whisper those words into the hearts of all Christians, Jews and Muslims the whole world round. “Peace be with you”.

Below are the readings for this Sunday with those words, phrases and thoughts highlighted that speak to my heart and soul

Second Sunday of Easter

The Collect:

Almighty and everlasting God, who in the Paschal mystery established the new covenant of reconciliation: Grant that all who have been reborn into the fellowship of Christ’s Body may show forth in their lives what they profess by their faith; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

First Lesson: Acts 5:27-32

When they had brought them, they had them stand before the council. The high priest questioned them, saying, “We gave you strict orders not to teach in this name, yet here you have filled Jerusalem with your teaching and you are determined to bring this man’s blood on us.” But Peter and the apostles answered, “We must obey God rather than any human authority. The God of our ancestors raised up Jesus, whom you had killed by hanging him on a tree. God exalted him at his right hand as Leader and Savior that he might give repentance to Israel and forgiveness of sins. And we are witnesses to these things, and so is the Holy Spirit whom God has given to those who obey him.”

Psalm 150

Hallelujah!
Praise God in his holy temple; *
      praise him in the firmament of his power.
Praise him for his mighty acts; *
      praise him for his excellent greatness.
Praise him with the blast of the ram’s-horn; *
      praise him with lyre and harp.
Praise him with timbrel and dance; *
      praise him with strings and pipe.
Praise him with resounding cymbals; *
      praise him with loud-clanging cymbals.
Let everything that has breath *
      praise the Lord.
      Hallelujah!

Epistle: Revelation 1:4-8

John to the seven churches that are in Asia: Grace to you and peace from him who is and who was and who is to come, and from the seven spirits who are before his throne, and from Jesus Christ, the faithful witness, the firstborn of the dead, and the ruler of the kings of the earth. To him who loves us and freed us from our sins by his blood, and made us to be a kingdom, priests serving his God and Father, to him be glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen. Look! He is coming with the clouds; every eye will see him, even those who pierced him; and on his account all the tribes of the earth will wail. So it is to be. Amen. “I am the Alpha and the Omega,” says the Lord God, who is and who was and who is to come, the Almighty.

Gospel: John 20:19-31

When it was evening on that day, the first day of the week, and the doors of the house where the disciples had met were locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” After he said this, he showed them his hands and his side. Then the disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” When he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” But Thomas (who was called the Twin), one of the twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.”

A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.” Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not written in this book. But these are written so that you may come to believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that through believing you may have life in his name.

What if it's all true!

 What if it's all true!

Above; A Russian and Ukrainian woman carry the cross the 13th Station of the Cross

In the early years of my ministry, I was called to the bedside of a woman nearing death. Her name was Ruthie and there she lay in great weakness. I asked her; “Ruthie, what’s it like?” I don’t know why I said that. 

But Ruthie looked at me excitedly, believe it or not; “Fr Paul, this is the greatest adventure I’ve ever been on. Soon, I shall be in Paradise!” Her faith astonished me. As is so often the case, she was the one who comforted me.

I said the prayers at the time of death and gave her communion. We spent some time in quiet to bask in the holiness of that awesome moment. And then she was gathered to all who have gone before. 

That’s when I thought. Yes. It is all true. 

Alleluia. Christ is risen!

The Lord is risen indeed. Alleluia!

There are those who have their doubts and that is understandable. I know I do. Many make no room in their lives for God or heaven or eternal life. After all, we live in a world that operates as if there’s nothing more than what you can see right in front of you. 

Warfare, for instance, is an experience of nihilism. As Churchill said; “Wow, look at you! You know how to make the rubble bounce!” Again we are caught up in the brutality of warfare. 

This year at the Coliseum in Rome on Good Friday the Pope gathered with thousands upon thousands. It was time for the Stations of the Cross. The thirteenth station marks the death of Jesus. The cross was carried by a Ukrainian and Russian family together. The two women looked at each other with tears mingling with sorrow, faith and a desperate hope for peace. As I watched, I found the moment deeply moving. 

And that’s when I wondered; “What if it’s all true? What if Jesus is victorious over sin and the grave?” I said it again with the millions upon millions over the millennia; 

Alleluia. Christ is Risen!

The Lord is Risen indeed. Alleluia!

When the women went to the tomb that first great Easter Day they had no idea that it was true. They merely found an empty tomb. Someone died. There’s nothing new in that! There was a good deal of panicky scurrying about as the disciples ran hither and yon trying to figure out what they had done with the body.

Then Mary was left alone. She came across one she took to be the gardener. Isn’t that perfectly delightful! The one who tends to the rising flowers bursting forth from the stone cold tomb of winter’s earth. She asked him where they have taken him?

And he says to her; “Mary!”

She recognizes him; “Rabbouni; Teacher.”

“I have seen the Lord!”

Here is the moment that changes everything

Christ has died.

Christ is risen. 

Christ will come again.

This time I’ve seen it with my own eyes! 

Like Peter whose Easter sermon proclaims; “We are witnesses to all that he did both in Judea and in Jerusalem. They put him to death by hanging him on a tree; but God raised him on the third day and allowed him to appear…to us who were chosen by God as witnesses, and who ate and drank with him after he rose from the dead. He commanded us to preach to the people and to testify that he is the one ordained by God as judge of the living and the dead.”

Furthermore, Eternal Life for Peter is not just something that happens when we die. Our new life in Christ begins with the first encounter with the Risen Lord. Notice how he begins his sermon. “I truly understand that God shows no partiality, but in every nation anyone who fears him and does what is right is acceptable to him”. Precisely the point. Whatever race, ethnicity,  class or gender identity, we are all one in Jesus

As I’ve said many times before, on a Pilgrimage to the Holy Land an old woman asked us; “What is the color of God?” 

We looked perplexed trying to understand what she was getting at. And she said; “The color of God is the color of water.”

We were in the Arab quarter in the old city of Jerusalem. We had been to the Wailing Wall with devout Jews, the Al-Aqsa Mosque with faithful Muslims, and the Holy Sepulcher where Christians mark the place of Jesus’ death. But the old woman’s question suddenly challenged all the categories and pigeon holes we humans use to organize our prejudices. 

Water is colorless. Our bodies are made up mostly of water. It flows through all life and unites us all as one human family. 

Peter finally gets it. God shows no partiality. 

The Gospel is about this kind of resurrection life. When Peter proclaims the Gospel it is about the simple fact that Jesus went about all Judea “doing good and healing all who were oppressed by the devil”. It seems there was a good deal of mental illness in those days among the suffering broken people Jesus met day in and day out. 

And so they put him to death by hanging him on a tree. Mosaic law condemned anyone who dies in this way. (Deuteronomy 21:22–23) And in America why did it take until March 29th of this year to sign the Emmett Till anti-lynching bill into law?

The power of all the hate and sin and death is so strong, isn’t it? But the power of Christ over all that sin and death is stronger still. The love of God made flesh and blood in Jesus overpowers every sin and every death. 

That’s why I decided to live the way I live. That is why you decided to live a Gospel life!

We are on the Greatest Adventure of our lives as Ruthie taught me so many years ago. Jesus Christ is Risen today. God shows no partiality and neither shall I nor any of you! He went about doing good and healing folks of all kinds of infirmities and so shall we. We’ve got work to do and its God’s work that needs to be done and that work needs to be done well. 

And besides, it’s all true! 

Christ has died.

Christ is risen.

Christ will come again.

Amen. In the Name of God the Most Holy, Undivided and Everlasting Trinity. Amen.

Fr Paul

The Collect: 

O God, who for our redemption gave your only-begotten Son to the death of the cross, and by his glorious resurrection delivered us from the power of our enemy: Grant us so to die daily to sin, that we may evermore live with him in the joy of his resurrection; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.

First Lesson: Acts 10:34-43 

Then Peter began to speak to them: “I truly understand that God shows no partiality, but in every nation anyone who fears him and does what is right is acceptable to him. You know the message he sent to the people of Israel, preaching peace by Jesus Christ—he is Lord of all. That message spread throughout Judea, beginning in Galilee after the baptism that John announced: how God anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Spirit and with power; how he went about doing good and healing all who were oppressed by the devil, for God was with him. We are witnesses to all that he did both in Judea and in Jerusalem. They put him to death by hanging him on a tree; but God raised him on the third day and allowed him to appear, not to all the people but to us who were chosen by God as witnesses, and who ate and drank with him after he rose from the dead. He commanded us to preach to the people and to testify that he is the one ordained by God as judge of the living and the dead. All the prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name.”

Psalm 118:1-2, 14-24

1 Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; *
      his mercy endures for ever.
2 Let Israel now proclaim, *
      “His mercy endures for ever.”
14 The Lord is my strength and my song, *
      and he has become my salvation.
15 There is a sound of exultation and victory *
      in the tents of the righteous:
16 “The right hand of the Lord has triumphed! *
      the right hand of the Lord is exalted!
      the right hand of the Lord has triumphed!”
17 I shall not die, but live, *
      and declare the works of the Lord.
18 The Lord has punished me sorely, *
      but he did not hand me over to death.
19 Open for me the gates of righteousness; *
      I will enter them;
      I will offer thanks to the Lord.
20 “This is the gate of the Lord; *
      he who is righteous may enter.”
21 I will give thanks to you, for you answered me *
      and have become my salvation.
22 The same stone which the builders rejected *
      has become the chief cornerstone.
23 This is the Lord’s doing, *
      and it is marvelous in our eyes.
24 On this day the Lord has acted; *
      we will rejoice and be glad in it.

Second Lesson: 1 Corinthians 15:19-26 

If for this life only we have hoped in Christ, we are of all people most to be pitied.

But in fact Christ has been raised from the dead, the first fruits of those who have died. For since death came through a human being, the resurrection of the dead has also come through a human being; for as all die in Adam, so all will be made alive in Christ. But each in his own order: Christ the first fruits, then at his coming those who belong to Christ. Then comes the end, when he hands over the kingdom to God the Father, after he has destroyed every ruler and every authority and power. For he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death.

Gospel: John 20:1-18

Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene came to the tomb and saw that the stone had been removed from the tomb. So she ran and went to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one whom Jesus loved, and said to them, “They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we do not know where they have laid him.” Then Peter and the other disciple set out and went toward the tomb. The two were running together, but the other disciple outran Peter and reached the tomb first. He bent down to look in and saw the linen wrappings lying there, but he did not go in. Then Simon Peter came, following him, and went into the tomb. He saw the linen wrappings lying there, and the cloth that had been on Jesus’ head, not lying with the linen wrappings but rolled up in a place by itself. Then the other disciple, who reached the tomb first, also went in, and he saw and believed; for as yet they did not understand the scripture, that he must rise from the dead. Then the disciples returned to their homes.

But Mary stood weeping outside the tomb. As she wept, she bent over to look into the tomb; and she saw two angels in white, sitting where the body of Jesus had been lying, one at the head and the other at the feet. They said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?” She said to them, “They have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid him.” When she had said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, but she did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you looking for?” Supposing him to be the gardener, she said to him, “Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have laid him, and I will take him away.” Jesus said to her, “Mary!” She turned and said to him in Hebrew, “Rabbouni!” (which means Teacher). Jesus said to her, “Do not hold on to me, because I have not yet ascended to the Father. But go to my brothers and say to them, ‘I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’” Mary Magdalene went and announced to the disciples, “I have seen the Lord”; and she told them that he had said these things to her.

A Palm Sunday Meditation

 A Palm Sunday Meditation

“Imitatio Christi”

"Palm Sunday" by Evans Yegon, Kenya

The “imitation of Christ”. 

Paul tells us in today’s Epistle; “Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus”.

We stand at the foot of the cross in silence because we recognize that the mind of Christ is in us.

We suffer as he did.

Our public suffering with Jesus is with the people of the Ukraine and the Pandemic that has touched us all.

The mind of Christ is with us in the sufferings we endure personally.

We loose loved ones. 

Family, friends and we ourselves suffer all kinds of loss and disease.

We share in the suffering of Jesus.

Interestingly, his equality with God was not something Jesus exploited. 

Rather he emptied himself.

He was in human form.

And then he became obedient even to the point of death.

This is the challenge of the “Imitation of Christ”; the “Imitatio Christi.”

Frankly, I find that I am rather full of myself.

But Jesus empties himself and looks at me to do the same.

It is just a fact of the Cross.

There is no other way around the Cross but through it,

In empty silence.

In the same way Jesus did.

Curiously as much as we find the Cross to be the end, for Jesus it is only the beginning.

In fact the logical next step for the death of Jesus is his exaltation. 

For as the Epistle says; “Therefore God also highly exalted him and gave him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bend, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”

That Name “Jesus” is shorthand for the Love of God made Flesh and Blood in him. 

He is the one who heals and brings the dead to life. 

He feeds the multitudes.

He seeks the lost sheep and the outcast.

He gathers us together as a hen gathers in her brood.

And we are called to “Imitate Christ” and be like him.

Like the early church in the days of persecution, the Celts in the time of foreign invasion, or the Confessing Church in Germany during the darkest days of Nazism we are called to live our lives like Jesus did.

We began with the Beatitudes and the Sermon on the Mount.

We stand empty and silent at the foot of the cross. 

We live our lives for the sake of those who need our courage and our love. 

This is our way to proclaim that “at the name of Jesus every knee should bend, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord”

This is why we sing “Hosanna! Lord, Hosanna. 

Hosanna in the Highest!” 

When we thought that the Cross was the end, we discovered it was only the beginning. 

These Palms are a sign of that Victory!

Ride on King Jesus. 

Ride on to die. 

Let every tongue in Heaven and Earth confess that Jesus Christ is Lord to the Glory of God in the Highest!

In the Name of God, the Most Holy, Undivided and Everlasting Trinity. Amen.

Epistle: Philippians 2:5-11

Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not regard equality with God as something to be exploited, but emptied himself, taking the form of a slave, being born in human likeness. And being found in human form, he humbled himself and became obedient to the point of death— even death on a cross. Therefore God also highly exalted him and gave him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bend, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

An Uncomfortable Gospel

 An Uncomfortable Gospel

This whole scene today with Mary and Jesus makes me very uncomfortable. The whole idea of a woman wiping my feet with her hair with that amount of perfume in front of the whole vestry the congregation, my wife, family and friends makes me squirm and I think for good reason. It seems awfully personal and frankly a bit over the top. 

And the amount of perfume. The last I checked, and I checked, a 10oz bottle of  Nard Magdalena Anointing Oil bottled in Jerusalem would cost $8.85 from Amazon. My Prime membership guarantees delivery by Friday. But did you know a pound of the stuff would set you back $2,986.62! I checked on that too! 

There’s not a vestry in the Episcopal Church that would’t raise objections if anyone went off and spent that amount of church funds without prior approval. And rightfully so! Can you imagine the debate if someone ventured the idea? I mean even folks who think the world of me would rightly ask good questions about that kind of expenditure especially if it would take away from other valuable programs in the church. We simply don’t have that kind of money to spare; and to what end?

John’s Gospel, in telling this story with the benefit of hindsight sees that Judas was not particularly concerned about the poor. But who among us serving on any vestry could justify such extravagance even if we know that our beloved is destined to die? 

But Jesus tells them to leave her alone. I mean think of it. There she is wiping his feet with her hair and the fragrance fills the entire house. Good heavens a pound of the stuff you could smell half a block away. What is going on here anyway?

Then Jesus mentions his burial as if she alone among them sees what is coming in our Lord’s life. She is preparing his body for the inevitable. She alone sees who he is to the disciples. He is the source of their forgiveness and eternal life. She has seen it time and again and knows of it in her own life. She knows she is personally forgiven and that he has given her eternal life. She alone understands, at some level, that he will die and then will rise again. And she will be there again with the other women to anoint his body for burial and will be among the first to see the Risen One.

The women who follow Jesus play a critical role in the salvation story. The Mary/Martha story is interesting when one is fussing over the cleanup and the dishes while the other sits at his feet hanging on every word that falls from his mouth. Then there is the woman at the well who Jesus meets at noonday. She has had a whole sequence of husbands and the one she had then was not her husband. Another fascinating encounter. And on an on and goes until Easter Day when it is the women who are there front and center to be the first to witness his Resurrection.

When a loved one dies we spare no expense. The average cost of a funeral in Massachusetts is around $10,000. 

By the way, the Book of Common Prayer urges the people to make responsible preparations for death so that the burden of it all does not fall on our families.

Many avoid the subject. Clergy and lawyers are notorious for avoiding the subject. But in my experience families are often thrown into the trauma of dealing with the subject and are left on their own to make arrangements. Aunt Shirley didn’t have a will, durable power of attorney or any other arrangements. When urged to do so she merely said that she was afraid if she did make arrangements something might happen to her. Then yes something did happen to her. Namely she died and the State of Florida made all the decisions about the disposal of her estate because she had not done so. 

Let that be a word to the wise. All this business of death and resurrection and even forgiveness can make us uncomfortable. It is all so personal especially when it happens to us or to a loved one.

But it happens. As the Great Litany cheerily reminds us

“From from violence, battle, and murder; and from dying suddenly and unprepared,

Good Lord, deliver us.”

That’s the key. From dying suddenly and unprepared! In this Gospel Jesus and Mary were embracing preparations and facing facts. Moreover Mary understood that Jesus was doing something new for us. As the Prophet Isaiah reminds us today “I am about to do a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?”

Jesus is about to introduce the idea of Forgiveness and Resurrection into our lives. Do you not perceive it?

This is what Paul is turning over in his mind in today’s Epistle. He is looking at life and death, suffering and resurrection and his life in Jesus and what that now means as something entirely new. He says; “I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the sharing of his sufferings by becoming like him in his death, if somehow I may attain the resurrection from the dead. Not that I have already obtained this or have already reached the goal; but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own.”

This is Paul’s way of understanding what it means to anoint Jesus with costly perfume. Pure nard. Even a whole pound of the stuff. 

Do you not perceive it, Jesus asks of us? 

Do you not understand what I am doing for you? 

Do you have any idea of how much I love you?

And as to the Resurrection from the dead. 

Do you not perceive it?

As uncomfortable as this moment between Jesus and Mary may make us feel, it remains a moment of pure innocence in the Gospel. Mary loves Jesus unlike anyone else gathered there that day. It had nothing to do with money but everything to do with the intimacy of her devotion to him and his love for her. No matter what she had done or not done in her life, Jesus loved her. Everything stood forgiven but more than that he gave her something entirely unexpected; Eternal Life. It was a life that had already begun and that she was living in the very moment she anointed his feet with her hair. There was nothing uncomfortable for Mary or Jesus in that moment. It was a moment of organic authenticity and fit perfectly into the plan of salvation Jesus prepared for her and for all of us. 

Which bring us finally to the words of today’s Collect; 

“Grant your people grace to love what you command and desire what you promise; that, among the swift and varied changes of the world, our hearts may surely there be fixed where true joys are to be found”

In the Name of God; the Most Holy, Undivided and Everlasting Trinity. Amen. 

Fr Paul

Below the readings appointed for the Fifth Sunday in Lent and highlights that speak to my heart and soul

Fifth Sunday in Lent

The Collect:

Almighty God, you alone can bring into order the unruly wills and affections of sinners: Grant your people grace to love what you command and desire what you promise; that, among the swift and varied changes of the world, our hearts may surely there be fixed where true joys are to be found; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.

First Lesson: Isaiah 43:16-21

Thus says the Lord, who makes a way in the sea, a path in the mighty waters, who brings out chariot and horse, army and warrior; they lie down, they cannot rise, they are extinguished, quenched like a wick: Do not remember the former things, or consider the things of old. I am about to do a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. The wild animals will honor me, the jackals and the ostriches; for I give water in the wilderness, rivers in the desert, to give drink to my chosen people, the people whom I formed for myself so that they might declare my praise.

Psalm 126

When the Lord restored the fortunes of Zion, *
       then were we like those who dream.
Then was our mouth filled with laughter, *
      and our tongue with shouts of joy.
Then they said among the nations, *
      “The Lord has done great things for them.”
The Lord has done great things for us, *
      and we are glad indeed.
Restore our fortunes, O Lord, *
      like the watercourses of the Negev.
Those who sowed with tears *
      will reap with songs of joy.
Those who go out weeping, carrying the seed, *
      will come again with joy, shouldering their sheaves.

Epistle: Philippians 3:4b-14

If anyone else has reason to be confident in the flesh, I have more: circumcised on the eighth day, a member of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew born of Hebrews; as to the law, a Pharisee; as to zeal, a persecutor of the church; as to righteousness under the law, blameless. Yet whatever gains I had, these I have come to regard as loss because of Christ. More than that, I regard everything as loss because of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things, and I regard them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ

and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but one that comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God based on faith. I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the sharing of his sufferings by becoming like him in his death, if somehow I may attain the resurrection from the dead. Not that I have already obtained this or have already reached the goal; but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Beloved, I do not consider that I have made it my own; but this one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus.

Gospel: John 12:1-8

Six days before the Passover Jesus came to Bethany, the home of Lazarus, whom he had raised from the dead. There they gave a dinner for him. Martha served, and Lazarus was one of those at the table with him. Mary took a pound of costly perfume made of pure nard, anointed Jesus’ feet, and wiped them with her hair. The house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume. But Judas Iscariot, one of his disciples (the one who was about to betray him), said, “Why was this perfume not sold for three hundred denarii and the money given to the poor?” (He said this not because he cared about the poor, but because he was a thief; he kept the common purse and used to steal what was put into it.) Jesus said, “Leave her alone. She bought it so that she might keep it for the day of my burial. You always have the poor with you, but you do not always have me.”